My main job as a Daddy: Preserving Mummy’s Sanity

I have one important job as a new daddy, and that is making sure my partner retains her sanity!

The best way to do this, I’ve found, is to make sure she gets sleep. Her level of sanity is directly proportional to the amount of sleep she gets. Which is why I’m sitting up now watching Pip sleep while she gets at least a few hours before he gets hungry again.

D might also argue that preserving her sanity is a bit hard because of existing, underling insanity. Which predates this whole pregnancy and baby thing.

I’m back at work, which means I’m often spending my evenings minding Pip while D sleeps. This has the added advantage for me of providing lots of time for baby cuddles. Baby cuddles are the best thing in the whole world.

Today is my Fifth Anniversary with D!

Today marks the fifth anniversary of D and I getting together. We met a month or so before then, but February 3rd 2008 was the date we went on our second date and had our first kiss! Which was in the middle of an exhibtion This is for me the longest I’ve continuously been in one relationship in my entire life. I’m 41 years old, so I’m not sure I should be too proud that it’s taken me this long to get my shit together, relationship-wise. My little brother, 27 years old, has been with his partner for longer!

I did date another woman for a total of about five years, but that was in two batches of two and a half years back when I was in my early twenties. As far as I know she’s now married and has at least one son.

And for a long time that seemed to be the most I could manage, two and a half years. I had two relationships, back to back, of that length from about 2002 to 2005. I was even briefly engaged.

This is also the date we originally planned for our wedding. Boy am I glad we brought that forward to November 2012. Pip’s due date was Friday the 1st, but he is in fact two weeks old today. Having a wedding when he was either very new or D was very pregnant would have been a nightmare.

So far Pip has celebrated by doing the biggest poo he’s ever done, being a bit colicy, and spewing most of his breakfast over himself and me! Later we might take the little vomit monster for a walk. D also seems to have re-dubbed his room as the “Vom and Poo Room”!

So here’s to our first half decade.

Surprise Appearances by my Partner’s Boobs!

So, as you can imagine my partner’s boobs have been getting a bit of a work out this last week. Pip has turned into a fantastic feeder, which in turn means a lot of milk is being produced.

Which doesn’t entirely explain the random appearance of boobs when perhaps they’re not actually actively engaged with Pip’s lips…!

So far they have put in an appearance in:

  • A Skype conversation I was having with my sister
  • When my mother was over and D decided to finally get dressed
  • During a conversation with another nursing mother D flipped up her shirt to show them off!

They even snuck into one corner of an otherwise uneventful shot of Pip whilst I was cuddling him. I’d posted the picture to facebook, where someone commented “Sneaky boob!”. We’ll see if Facebook every spots that nipple…

I Feel I Should Have An Opinion about this Kochie Breastfeeding Fuss

I feel like I should form an opinion about this sunrise host breastfeeding fuss as a new daddy with a breast feeding partner.

But I’m finding it incredibly hard to give a fuck about the mindless musings of some B-list celebrity TV host on a show I never ever watch on a TV station I also never watch! I don’t doubt that the twit is an insensitive numpty, but I would expect nothing less from trivial little talking head from a fluffy show on a commercial television show. I doubt they’ve ever had an insight of any kind.

And needless to say the opinions of any man on a subject like breast feeding or anything else which is unique to women (see the US Republicans for some lovely opinions on the subject) are of absolutely no consequence whatsoever. This includes mine – owning a penis and being a middle aged white man gives me no privileges at all!

OK, this got a bit ranty. I’ll leave it to the feisty breast feeding militia to hang him by the balls.

One final thing. He was quoted today saying he was the subject of a social media vendetta, or words to that effect. To which I say – social is the voice of the people these days, get used to hearing from everyone. When women are pissed, these will let you know!

Suddenly: Baby!

So, somewhat unexpectedly, although not technically early, we had a baby in the early morning of Sunday the 20th of January. Pip’s due date was February 1st, but as I mentioned in an earlier post, due dates are A Tissue of Lies! Pip turning up at 38 weeks and 2 days is therefore perfectly normal.

I will write a much longer post on the subject soon. I was planning a post about how labour never really follows the traditional, clich├ęd, movie and TV scenario. Which goes roughly:

  1. Waters Break
  2. Contractions start
  3. Mad dash to hospital
  4. A great deal of screaming and squeezing of hands
  5. Baby appears

I was going to say how rare this actually is and all births are different and so on, as if four birthing classes have made me some kind of expert.

But for us is this more or less exactly what happened! Complete with screaming mother-to-be in the back seat of the car!

Will flesh out the story soon, maybe once I’ve got some – some! – of my sleep debt erased*.

(* this never happens.)

My new name: Daddy Bear!

My partner has taken to calling me her “Lovely Furry Daddy Bear!” I do hope this doesn’t continue after Pip is born… I can see my kid now, after her learns to talk, introducing me as his “Daddy Bear”!

My response? I said “how are you my lovely pink whale?” He he, I didn’t even get slapped!

Scenes from the Nesting

Nesting is continuing apace. I’m back at work, but I get reports from my increasingly manic partner every day.

I also spent five long long hours on the weekend removing weeds from all the cement areas around our house. Whilst I appreciate all the cement reduces the amount of lawn I have to mow, they could at least have laid it without gaps. Gaps just wide enough for robust virulent weeds to thrive!

D, my partner, dropped everything in the middle of dinner the other night, fixed me with an intense stare and said “these kitchen cupboards are filthy! Then she scrubbed them cleaner than they’ve been since we moved in. They say nesting is a sign the baby is due… So when she squealed that the kitchen light switch needed cleaning and proceeded to scrub it… I assumed the contractions had started. But no. I do worry where this is going to go before the baby finally appears!

The Pregnant Lady who cried Woof

So, I as mentioned, we’ve hit 37 weeks.

My heavily pregnant partner has a habit of being quite enthusiastic about a lot of things, which means she often starts sentences excitedly with “Guess what!”. This is has been fine up to now, but in the last couple of days she’s done it a couple of times and I’ve immediately thought “Ah! She must be in labour!”. But no, it’s usually something else entirely – she bought a cool baby thing at the mall, or someone else has announced they’re pregnant. Or she had a really good nap, you know things of far less importance.

This nesting mode she’s in also means she liable to call me twice a day. Often breathlessly starting her calls with a burst of excitement.

So, I have made her swear that she’ll try and keep the excitement contained so that I, the daddy to be, doesn’t get all excited and starts loading bags into the car or running the bath or something!